scent

for the first time i put on grandma's robe that mom carried all the way from florida for me. it smells of her, whatever that combination is: laundry detergent, the soft sarasota water, her soap, the clean body smell that's hers alone. instantly i felt security, followed by great heaving pain. i miss her quite excruciatingly. and this lovely, warm scent i'm literally wrapped in maddeningly both makes me feel better and so much worse.